Graduation Rumination X - Cap and Gown

April 7, 2015.

You can’t stay in college forever. And no matter how much I try to deny it, my time here is coming to a close. I can try and pretend like it’s not happening, I can try and turn my back on the future that is surely going to come, but that’s the thing, it is going to come.

I got my cap and gown today. It was nicely bundled in its little package, the gown folded neatly around the cap, the tassel tossed in on top. There was no graduation year on the tassel, which I suppose is okay, but not what I was expecting. It was quick to get it, too. Walk up to the table, which was in Jenks of all places, say your name, sign a form, and grab your things. Cap, gown, tassel, white neck thing, Baccalaureate and Commencement tickets, oh and instructions on how to wear the white thing, and how long your gown should be, and how to get the wrinkles out of it (steam, not iron). It wasn’t heavy, the material is thin and the bag itself was light, but it felt so heavy in my hands. I could feel it burning my palms as I walked away from the table. It’s not like I didn’t know the day was coming. We got like a million emails from Janet Potts about it. That’s one of only a very few things I probably wont miss about Gordon, all the emails all the time. So I mean, I knew it was coming but what does that change? April 7^th, April 7^th, April 7^th. It seemed a little early to get them if you ask me, but then again I guess graduation isn’t all that far away. Which is terrifying in its own right. But day by day, you’ve got to take this thing day by day or you’ll never make it to May, at least not with your sanity in tact. So Today I got my cap and gown, and tomorrow I’ll try the thing on. And the tomorrows after that I’ll do a bunch of other normal daily things, and one day today will be May 16^th. But that’s not now, that’s not today. Today I just get the cap and the gown.

I can’t stay here forever, I don’t think I’d like to stay here forever if I’m being totally honest, but I either way I’m leaving in a little over a month. And it feels a heck of a lot more real today than it did yesterday or the yesterday before that. But it’s okay; I’ve tucked the cap and gown away to a place where I can’t see them. I’ll take it out again, but only with just enough time to steam it before I have to wear it.

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